New Meditation Video: Healing Depression by Clearing the Arc Line

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sol_Invictus, 8/27/16

Each of the 10 bodies have a very specific role. When they are in alignment they help us to live to our highest potential, our destiny. The 6th body (Arc Line) is often symbolized in pictures of a halo around the head. You can see it in almost any famous painting of a saint, angel, or spiritual teacher.

Women have a second Arc Line that reaches from nipple to nipple of the chest. It is in these two regions where we store past relationships and karma. 

I wanted to focus on the particular importance of a strong and clear Arc Line to deflect symptoms of depression. It's our projection of our Arc Line that creates your reality. Hence we can either create 'heaven' or 'hell' on earth depending on the strength of our Arc Line (among many other things). It's the foundation of the radiant body. So when we connect with our own radiance (joy, happiness, light) we naturally project that out into the world. If it is clear then we repel negativity easily from either our thoughts or external environment.

I'm excited to talk more about the Arc Line and how to help with symptoms of depression in my upcoming 4 week series in September.

In the meantime, here's my latest video as I teach the Meditation for the Arc Line!

Navigating Through Winter: Kidney Health

A few weeks ago I woke up during the Amrit Vela with excruciating right lower back pain accompanied by relentless vomiting. With every hour the pain got worse. One acupuncture appointment visit followed by urgent care, and then finally a visit to the hospital 72 hours later revealed that I had a small kidney stone ready to be released. Looking back, I give credit to my acupuncturist, who is also my Zero Balancing teacher, for guiding the movement of the stone in addition to my dear friends who took care of me. Now that the trauma and story associated with the event has cleared along with the kidney stone, I've been taking the time to reflect on how and why this healing opportunity presented itself to me.

Your Lifeline: The Kidneys

This healing crisis gave me an opportunity to do extensive research about the kidneys. What was interesting is that I didn't have to go far since I had all the information available through textbooks and lecture notes from my Kundalini Yoga therapy training module earlier this year.

The kidneys are more fundamentally important than one might think. With the winter season being in full swing, we are well into the water element which is associated directly with kidney energy. The kidneys are also associated with bone, teeth, and bone marrow. This could be one reason why kidney energy is very low with people who have osteoporosis. Low kidney energy is also directly related to back and knee pain. If you're not convinced yet about how important kidneys are by now then take a look at the lungs. The kidney meridian ends in the lungs. It grasps Qi by pulling and directing the energy down. This occurs when we take a deep breath. Here lies the fundamental importance of yoga, the breath. That's why pranyama techniques direct the breath.

Ever wonder why there are so many postures, kriyas, and meditations that focus on the kidney? Well this is why. The kidneys store the Will. Like all organs, the kidneys have both a yin and yang polarity. In the book, “The Web that Has No Weaver”, the author states the Yin Will is mysterious, subtle, and noticed in stillness. The book also states, “It is the recognition that the deepest force requires no effort.” (p. 86). I'll talk more about my own experience of this later in this blog entry.

The kidneys also store the “Jing”, the Essence of life, according to Chinese medicine. The Jing contains your genetic imprint of who you are. It is also manifests in the material world via the sexual organs. The sexual organs are located in the second chakra, which is guided by the water element. The Ojas is located within the cerebrospinal fluid and determines the caliber or level of Consciousness for an individual. As many of you know, the nadis (or energetic meridian centers) vibrate at the correct frequency/rhythm when sound is applied. Everything is moving at some kind of sound vibration. When there is a correct frequency of the nadis then the Ojas is changed.

From an emotional viewpoint the kidneys are associated with the positive aspects of motivation, creativity, and living our dreams (starting from thought to physical manifestation). The kidneys bring meaning to the cliché of “finding yourself”. On the opposite polarity, the kidneys are also associated with fear, timidity, and fearful/traumatic events like war or violence. That is why healing of the kidneys is imperative for a balanced life. A Course in Miracles states, “All healing is essentially the release of fear” (p. 23). Perhaps this is why that most spiritual practices have a commonality in that anything that is not love is fear.

Why My Kidneys Were Talking To Me

The body, mind, and soul are undeniably interconnected. Disease and injury is nothing but “dis-ease” in the body. It's a cry out from the soul or mind for healing causing a physical manifestation. My kidneys had some not-so subtle messages, though. It felt that this experience was an initiation of moving past many of the deepest aspects of fear and darkness I was still holding onto including fear of authority and the unknown. I've been clearing through these fears like a bulldozer.

The ego's need to effectively bulldoze my way through fear was the primary issue. I met up with Hari Nam Singh, a wonderful world traveling teacher and immediate soul brother about a month or so prior to the kidney stone experience. He was stopping through Portland before heading to another far off land, Florida. He said the ultimate yogi is simultaneously completely committed and also fully relaxed. His words stuck with me. Up until that point, I was wholeheartedly dedicated to an extensive Kundalini Yoga practice and meditating daily for the last 3 years. I took weekly classes and was very involved in the community. I know without a doubt I wouldn't be the woman I am today without these tools. The only problem was that I wasn't relaxed through most of it. Up until that point I thought it was the stoic warrior way to cut through all these blockages so courageously. Although I smiled at times through it, was I really enjoying the good and the bad while treating both indifferently? I still am continuing my 1000 day meditation and doing yoga as often as I can, but I am doing it with more ease, grace, and self love than ever before. Even now, my kidneys still give me signals if I do too much. I taught my students to start small and take baby steps, but I wasn't allowing myself the same opportunity even as an intermediate/advanced student. This goes back to always keeping a beginner's mind. I am finally starting to embody the teachings and realize that there are opportunities to push it and cut through blockages relentlessly, but there are also opportunities to rest. This concept of trying too hard not surprisingly leaked into other aspects of my life such as relationships and work.

I feel that there is an important aspect of readiness as well. I know now, without a doubt, I was ready for this initiation, although it may not have felt like it at the time. The Course of Miracles also addresses readiness. It states, “We have already attempted to correct the fundamental error that fear can be mastered, and have emphasized that the only real mastery is through love. Readiness is only the beginning of confidence. You may think this implies that an enormous amount of time is necessary between readiness and mastery, but let me remind you that time and space are under my control” (p. 33). Through this lesson a deeper sense of inner joy and playfulness has resulted. I feel like I am laughing more and enjoying the almost unnoticeable aspects of mundane day to day life more. I'm seeking out opportunities during my day to put in the balanced amount of effort instead of the usual overload. As a result my relationships have blossomed and deepened and work is more fulfilling.

I can't help shedding light on some other coincidences that happened these past few weeks. Just prior to the kidney stone experience I was gifted to hold a copy of the Guru in my home. Very subtle things in my Consciousness have shifted since reading from it daily. Then after the kidney stone passed my intuition guided me to get a copy of the Course in Miracles. Now that I am reading from both I am humbled and in awe at the changes occurring. It seems that every day there is a very specific message that is being transmitted to me every time I read. I feel very blessed to be living as a Sikh yet continuing to develop this strong relationship with Christ. The sense of purpose and clarity is so strong I feel it is beyond dogma or any religion, with this “it” being in the manifestation as Truth. At the same time this is a learning experience and in small steps. It is still quite new and I am continuing to process all these experiences. From what I've been hearing, it seems that many other beings are going through similar initiations and transformational experiences as 2014 comes to an end. I am ecstatic to not only see but experience the change from “I” to “We” as we venture further into the Aquarian Age.

References:

 The Web that Has No Weaver . Kaptchuk, T.J. (2000)

A Course In Miracles. (2007).

Personal lecture notes (May 2014) from Guru Dharam Singh. Kundalini Yoga Therapy Training. (www.i-sky.net)

Cultivating Aspects of Prosperity

I was recently looking back on previous blog posts. I realized my blog posting on prosperity received the most views out of any of my blog posts. Moving along with the theme, I thought I'd touch base once again on my recent experiences of prosperity. In the past 9 months life changing events have beckoned me to embrace a deeper level of prosperity. I feel that I have been catapulted into a whole new container of prosperity in the past month or so. Like many of us on this courageous journey, I am being asked to shine my Light more than ever before. It's a tall order for anyone to do such a thing with grace despite the daily chaos and ongoing changes of our personal lives, community, and the world.

With that, it's taken some time since my last blog post to integrate these changes and find words to express what prosperity means to me. This is just the beginning.

Patience
Many have heard the saying that any good thing worth investing in takes patience. Yogi Bhajan said, "Patience pays. Wait. Let the hand of God work for you. The One who has created you, let Him create all the environments, circumstances, and facilities and faculties.” This has always been a difficult lesson for me. It's only now that I am embracing what this means for me. Being slow and steady in the race wasn't my forte in the past 10 years. Yet now I am noticing when I am patient and allow the Divine to work through me, it take a lot less effort. A dear teacher told me at Summer Solstice this year that all will come to me if I just sit, smile, be radiant, and welcome everything.

Recognize and resonate

On New Years Eve 2012 the Kundalini Yoga Community gathered at Hari Dass's home. It was there where we set intentions for our needs and values. Needs are the things in life that are essential for us to live out our soul's destiny, our life path. Values are the are things that we need to guide and support our needs. Values can change and fluctuate as long as they support the ultimate need of what we want in life. Over the past few months, I've had to reflect on what values and needs were being honored. If something wasn't being fulfilled in my life according to these principles then I needed to change my circumstances so they would be congruent with my life choices once again. With all that being said, there was no way I could call prosperity into my life until I knew what these values and needs were.

Once I was able to recognize my values and needs. I could then be able to resonate those intentions in my life. Something was holding me back, though. Through the help of a few very powerful teachers in my life, I was able to see the underlying beliefs that were preventing me from moving forward. A good analogy is paddling upstream with a hole in our kayak. No matter how hard we try, we just keep sinking deeper into the limiting belief until the hole is identified. When that happens then the hole can be filled in with a new belief that supports our higher Consciousness. Finally, we are then able to resonate and vibrate our Truth.

Opening

It's pretty self explanatory when we are open to receiving prosperity then it will come pouring in. However, I feel that the previous key points of recognizing your values and needs in addition to resonating your Truth is essential in order to cultivate this opening. That's why tools like Kundalini Yoga are great in facilitating this opening and balancing of the energy systems. The

Set for Opportunity and Green Energy   is  a great prosperity oriented kriya that opened many opportunities for me in a very short period of time. Just remember that everyone's process is different, though. (Kriya retrieved on 7/17/14 from http://www.bodymindgifts.com/greenenergy1.pdf)

Strength

It takes a lot of strength and courage to bring prosperity into our lives. So many people say that they want more prosperity yet are really too scared to accept it. It's a lot easier to stay in the confines of a familiar and comfortable life even those most people know they deserve better. Only the courageously strong people have the grit to walk gracefully through the tests presented on the journey of cultivating prosperity.

Practice

Repetition is the key. Having a daily sadhana (daily practice) is essential in life. When I first started on my journey through Kundalini Yoga, my sadhana consisted of a 3-7 minute meditation and nothing more. Slowly and gradually with practice, I was able to increase that time. Now my daily sadhana is an essential part of who I am in order for me to be my authentic self each day. Practicing every day has taught me what it means to commit to myself, my word, and therefore everything in life. Without a daily practice I couldn't imagine being able to understand, embrace, and accept what prosperity means for me. I often tell others that although Kundalini Yoga is quite effective and transforming, it doesn't have to be their practice. Especially in the beginning of any journey, it's important to commit to something, weather it is taking a 30 minute walk every day, eating healthier, or doing a hobby that you enjoy. Sadhana is practicing prosperity in real life. We may not want to do it every day, but we know the benefits of it are long lasting.

Energy Conservation

As prosperity continues to flow into our lives, it's important to know we always have a choice. For me, prosperity tends to comes in huge waves of transformation. Other times, it comes in little spurts, which is just as beautiful. Either way, it's important to know what opportunities to accept and what we can say 'no' to. My life's path is to be of service to others. However, many times I have to learn that being given opportunities to be of service doesn't mean I have to sacrifice my sanity or health. That's why energy conservation has been very important to me. It's important to have the clarity of what opportunities to accept and if it's the right timing to accept it. Many people, including myself, have had experiences that they took on too much responsibility only after already committing to the project. That's why it's important to be committed to ourselves first and having our needs met before adding more onto our plate.

Relax

This is something that we can all work on no matter how good we think we are at relaxing. It also coincides with patience. None of the things I mentioned above can happen if there isn't a sense of relaxing into the process as it unfolds in it's perfect timing.

I got a big dose of what this means while at Summer Solstice this year. Countless times I would be solely focusing on my process, often working through an intense blockage or emotion. Yet I smiled, relaxed, and sat through the uncomfortable moments knowing they would pass. When I allowed the process to be what it was, something profound would happen to me. Someone would come and start talking to me, having no idea what was going on with me internally. An unexpected experience in my surroundings would occur, like a unexpected rain storm in the middle of the desert, or an entire walkway of the bazaar clearing in my presence to name just a few. It was only in these moments of relaxing into patience and the uncomfortable feelings of transition where the deepest healing was able to occur. 

 

Intuition

As in everything in life, it takes accessing innate intuition to know clearly what prosperity looks like. It's unique for everyone and can reach far beyond the realms of financial prosperity. There's a lot I could say about intuition, but I'll save it for another time.

Thankfulness

Having an attitude of gratitude alone in itself can create plenty of transformation. When we are grateful for all the perceived good and bad experiences, we can remember it is all One. It's easy to be grateful for the good, but sometimes difficult to be grateful for the challenges. These polarities are essential for anything creative to occur.

Yes!

It's appropriate to end this post with reminding us all to say, “yes”, to prosperity. Sometimes the most difficult thing to do is say, “yes” to all the gifts that we are given. Saying yes can also be simple and easy. May you know it is your birthright to be happy, be bright, and be the healing Light we all need to cultivate prosperity within ourselves and for others.

The Place Between the Inhale and Exhale

This poem or string of words, has been percolating for some time. It was inspired by a class I recently took with Gurmukh Kaur, yoga therapy training in Los Angeles, recent life events, and wisdom I received from wise counsel. I also thought this was a good to share during this very interesting time in full moon and Mercury in retrograde.

Inhale..Pause...

Reconsider what is to come next

Dangling in this moment of simultaneous purgatory, confusion, and perfection.

Death and rebirth are the same.

The contentment in knowing the prayer has been sent and will be answered on it's own accord.

The pause that renders the audacity to receive gifts once thought not deserved.

The choice to act courageously towards a goal not yet known.

Putting aside the urgency so that we may listen for the silence through the influence of gratitude.

Look how far we have come to be standing in this here and now.

Exhale..Pause

To wait patiently in the pause,

the uncomfortable and unfortunate feelings of the unknown.

Seduction of darkness whispers for me to go deeper.

All must be balanced in the accumulation and the letting go.

This natural cycle is merely doing what it does best to keep all in harmony.

So why do we fight it relentlessly and sigh with disdain when it comes near?

Fear of being alone, of not having this, that, who, what in our life.

Surely it will all come back ten fold, often in a different mold than projected.

The mystery of prosperity hidden in the apana.

In the end a bigger hole to be filled by that which already resides within.

To see beyond the "you" and "I."

The merge into “we” dares not happen on the human's watch.

Only these brave souls are courageous enough to explore this pause,

the transformation from “we” to “all”.

The pause

the test

the block

the ultimate fork in the road.

How silly we are to be afraid of coming to these crossroads.

When this is the opportunity to eliminate polarity of self.

To find out what this experience is about.

To stop hiding from the Truth.

Afraid of seeing something we may not like.

Taking off the rose colored glasses.

For who will be judge but you.

Therefore nothing can be the wrong choice

and all is victorious.

The universe conspiring in our favor.

Let us challenge the elimination of the “you” and “I”.

The weapon of choice is self love

which cannot help but manifest and multiply in itself

only to be radiated in reflection of another.

If we are to be exhausted from this battle,

may we be thrown gracefully into the field of zero plus one.

May the polarities be neutralized.

May we have the courage to embrace the ultimate commitment to ourselves.

So all that is left is the place between the inhale and the exhale.

Pause.

The Link Between Yoga and the Feldenkrais Method®

The past few years I have been learning various movement approaches through the Feldenkrais Method® and Spacial Dynamics®. These two aspects of healing through movement have greatly impacted my work as a physical therapist assistant. As I continue to teach others about utilizing these concepts, I am consistently learning to master how they can be incorporated in my daily life. With that, I am also starting to incorporate aspects of  Kundalini Yoga into sessions with clients. Undoubtedly Kundalini Yoga, the Feldenkrais Method®, and Spacial Dynamics® have a common thread in supporting the balancing and reorganization of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems. I found an intriguing article through the newsletter, "Sense Ability", which explains the link between yoga and the Feldenkrais Method® in a way that is engaging to one of any type of yoga practice.

You can read it here:

"The Joy of Discovery "

by Deedee Eisenburg P.h.D

Getting Your Wheels In Motion

I thought I'd share a small portion of what I offer clients through my work as a physical therapist assistant. You can also access this article and more information through the Wholeness In Motion website, HERE.

With spring time blooming before our eyes, it's time to get our wheels into gear. Perhaps you want to get started on tending to a new garden, give your home a thorough spring cleaning, have more play time with your kids, or get out and hike. It can be challenging to complete all these daily needs if our wheels aren't moving with fluidity and the gears aren't in proper functioning order. 

How are My Wheels Spinning?

So how are all these wheels and gear metaphors supposed to help you in the first place? A swiss neurologist named Alois Brugger (1920-2001) created one of the first 'get your wheels in motion' theories. Through his concept of the Brugger's Cogwheel, he was able to identify how different parts of the spine are interdependent on one another, much like wheels and gears on a bike. If one wheel isn't working properly then the rest of the system won't function smoothly. It could result in more effort to get up those steep hills of a busy life. Brugger related this with posture in saying that poor posture is not caused by how well you can hold a stoic posture with your shoulders back, chest high, and neck straight. Rather, poor posture is caused by a dysregulation of central motor function, our nervous  system. 

What Happens When a Wheel Gets Stuck

I'd like to think of the nervous system as the gears that control the movement of the wheels. Minute changes in the different segments, or wheels, of the spine create what 'posture' means to us. That's why everyone's posture is unique and individualized. 

Brugger stated that one doesn't have to have pain to in order to know he/she has poor posture. The nervous system is magnificent in that it is able to adapt to mostly any input it is given. So when you sit at your computer desk or hunch over your garden bed, your brain accommodates for the positioning. It does this by changing the signals sent from the brain to the muscles, and back to the brain. This feedback loop repeats until the signals being sent to the brain are changed. Pain occurs only when regulatory protective mechanisms aren’t enough to hold the person in their postural alignment. In addition, pain doesn't necessarily originate where pain is experienced. For example, if someone has pain in their mid back it could be because the wheels above or below that segment aren't functioning well. Even though the person may or may not feel in these other areas, the movement of the wheels will assuredly be affected. When the wheels are functioning properly then all the other organ systems can function well too, such as improved respiration and circulation.

Connecting With Your Wheels

Here is a simple movement exercise you can do to connect with the wheels of your spine.

1. Sit at the edge of a chair, feet flat on the floor. 

2. Begin to draw your pubic bone forward and down to allow the pelvis to tilt forward. Allow the movement to start at the base of the spine and initiate the cogwheel interplay of lower spine, middle spine & neck.

3. While continuing the motion notice how the movement flows through the torso and mid back...the neck & head.  Utilize Brugger's cogwheel image.  If you can't imagine the cogwheels, stop, imagine the reverse cogwheel action & then reverse it again.

4.  Continue rolling the pelvis forward & backward (tucking tail/lifting pubic bone<>pubic bone down/forward & tailbone lifting) and clarifying the cogwheel effect. 

5) For extra credit, see what this same movement feels like with incorporating the pelvic floor in each direction.

 Repeat 5-10 times in a pain free range of movement.

The Brugger's Cogwheel is just one way of connecting to the available movement that your body has to offer. At Wholeness in Motion, we can work with you on helping to master these movements and how they are unique for you.

Written by: Susan Trancik, PTA

References:

1)http://www.dynamicchiropractic.com/mpacms/dc/article.php?id=18210 (retrieved on 3/17/14)

2) http://books.google.com/books?id=mLMLFOlua3YC&pg=PA353&lpg=PA353&dq=bruggers+cogwheel+posture&source=bl&ots=twnwBG9EWO&sig=s9P7MhdODRHRXBkOrLCw_XXqXbk&hl=en&sa=X&ei=UN4hU9XKB4H1oASfoIGYAQ&ved=0CCoQ6AEwAQ#v=onepage&q=bruggers%20cogwheel%20posture&f=false (retrieved on 3/17/14)

3) http://victoriatheraputicmassage.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/8ff6a.jpg (retrived on 3/24/14)

4)https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfUhRu7zIS3F3ETasCzT52SxPiwrl0ExA6W7Id2a5XNKMiOrWhTpZrHmm73eL9gTA9zjZGeeh8aJbhvsPS_kNfwYIjDQYd1-o9vRD5ioMUiNz0MgP0vcR2yNeVC0Qqj4Bqo3rpKMGIn-M/s1600/brugger%20cog%20wheel%203.jpg 

(retrieved on 3/24/14)

In It Together

Photo by Krisiey Rocha Salsa

It's been awhile since I've felt the need to write as often. I'm sure many can agree that much has been transforming at quite a rapid pace since the beginning of the year. Relationships with myself and others have gone into the depths of joy and also darkness during these winter months. It's comforting to know that everything is constantly being churned, stirred, and transitioning into something better that serves me. There's always a moon or planet going direct, retrograde, in full light, in a shadow and whatnot. The rippling effects of these planets constantly in flux have given me a new found respect for for how we are all interconnected with the galaxies upon galaxies and with each other. For even those that are in doubt about astrology can't deny that things have been a bit stirred up for some time now. Perhaps the only thing that has saved me is humor and being light hearted when I am reminded. I'm finally coming to a much needed exhale in life, and noticing a time of rest is starting to bless my world for the moment.

A Triggered Moment

I was recently at a dog park enjoying this unity of others. It's beautiful to observe a pack of dogs all running together, having never seen each other moments prior. Although in a quiet and more solitude state, I enjoyed watching the differences of the dog pack and human packs that were formulating. It reminded me that although we crave solitude, space, and time for reflection, we can't deny the need to be with others. When I got home my dog, Buzz, anxiously rubbed against my leg and looked at me with concern. I wasn't sure what happened as our walk home wasn't anything out of the usual. However, once I looked at his leg I knew why he seemed concerned. My motherly instincts kicked into high gear as I tried to clean a large and deep wound hidden under his white fur. I began comforting him by saying, “shhh..shhhh...you're ok”. With a slight smirk on his face, my boyfriend kindly asked why I kept saying that to him? He didn't understand why I was telling my dog he was 'ok' when he obviously wasn't. I continued my motherly duties as best as I could while increasingly becoming annoyed at this trigger. But why? It wasn't until much later after a vet placed a few staples in my dog's thigh the underlying learning experience behind this event.

To Perceive and Be Perceived

In retrospect I noticed that my dog probably didn't care much nor understand anything that I was saying. He just wanted this hole in his thigh to be healed and have a few treats afterward. It propelled me into thinking about what I would do if he was a child. We see parents consoling their children all the time after they experience any form of pain. Our innate nature is to tell them they are either going to be ok, or are ok. My experience was often being told to “walk it off” or “don't cry”. That lead to a lot of crying in my teens and twenties. From a practical standpoint we know that of course they will be fine at some point. We often console ourselves or others by saying these words in attempt to stay positive. One could say it's an act of faith, or even a 'fake it to you make it' approach. When we are unsure, it's better to project an outcome of us winning in the end than not. Then I started to notice that when we admit to things when life isn't “OK”, then we bring power to the present moment. It creates an automatic opportunity to embrace personal power by not only identifying what isn't working, but stating clearly what your needs are.

I notice that the most authentic and effective healing practitioners rarely say “You're OK”. Instead, they tactfully approach people with compassion and see the health issue for what it is. They take the necessary steps to find a solution with the help of the client. I notice how I often approach my clients in this way, so why not my most beloved dog and others I care for? These are the deep intertwined roots of learned behavior that are slowly be unwound.

I'm Here

Now that I know what not to do, I'm trying to focus on the positive aspect, but from a healthier approach. Although I am not consoling a dog or any humans during a bloody trauma on a daily basis, I realize I do provide a more subtle form of care to the clients I see and the people I interact with on a daily basis. With that I notice we have a choice every day to offer healing to another in small ways. Perhaps there's another option of instead of trying to change someone's perception of what they are experiencing. The last thing someone wants to hear when they are in emotional or physical pain is “You are OK”. Maybe an alternative approach can be, “I'm here”. This simple phrase not only let's the person know that you are present with them but also what they are experiencing. When I tried to override my old pattern by saying this to my dog, it allowed me feel deeper into my own fear about losing the one consistent thing in my life for the last 8 years. It allowed me to be more authentic with my own feelings and therefore be more present for my dog. I know that when I am present for the humans in my life in this way I can follow it with asking how I can help them. Looking at the big picture, this gives others the power and responsibility to speak for their own needs without me trying to take responsibility or fix situations or people.

This concept of reclaiming ownership of responsibility, power, and thought has been brought to my attention in many layers these past few years. Each layer gets pealed away only to reveal another depth of genuine vulnerability, authenticity, and trust. While everything continues to shift and fluctuate, let's help each other out a little more with kindness by simply saying, “I'm here”, even when we don't know what to do. The path show us where to go, but we have to start somewhere.

The Beginner's Mind

photo by http://www.flickr.com/photos/38918634@N00/397824732/sizes/l/

I can only hope to keep a beginner's mind

to withhold nothing but my expectations,

suspending my beliefs for a brief while

so that I may be in this experience

for what it is without wanting to change it.

For if I always had a beginner's mind

then there would be no need for a concept of

limited time, compare and contrast, or analysis.

No such concepts or ideas could exist,

because there is nothing that exists prior to

this experience even worth to compare.

So maybe I can go way back

like it's the first crawl on my hands and knees

wiggling around with anticipation.

Looking, listening, and feeling each movement

following the next utilizing no tools but

only a deep seated curiosity in seeing

how this puzzle piece of a body, a mind, and soul

can fit effortlessly together.

Maybe I can touch and allow the healing of another

with deep appreciation that this body in my hands

will never, has never, nor could ever be like any other.

Therefore it will heal like no other.

It has more capabilities and possibilities to heal

like none other.

Perhaps the more I sit and surrender to these unknowing ways,

getting out of the way,

the healing will be allowed to do it's part.

It is only then when I will have permission to do my part

that which I am still figuring out with each touch.

Always reaching for ground zero rather than looking elsewhere.

Yet at the same time flying high to see the wide perspective.

With this beginner's mind I can explore the curiosities

of sensation through tenderness, compassion, kindness,

eroticism, playfulness, gentleness, passion, and all those

experiences of movement I take for granted.

May I appreciate one moment and then regard it as a daily

and equally unique happening in another.

I think of the moments of the imbalances where those touched

need to touch more often

and the one's touching need to be more touched by others.

I think of how we need to hug ourselves more, lay a gentle

hand on an elder, and embrace our children, each others' children.

I hope when these moments come

I receive and give them with gratitude.

A new freshness, quiet solitude, and cozy feeling

settles in my heart on these first days of the new year.

These thoughts of letting go, letting in, accepting,

and reflection are within many people's minds.

Yet for me the only thing I wish is to have is a beginner's mind

every day as a healer, teacher, friend, daughter, lover, and woman.

And through this I enter into happiness.