Dark Sister, Light Sister

As autumn continues to transition into winter many of us have a natural tendency to go inward. As usual, there's a bunch of planets out of alignment which creates an opportunity for heavier stuff to be processed. Here are some words that flowed through me in regards to clarifying deeper parts of my shadow self. If you'd like to discover more aspects of your shadow self, I highly recommend having a session with Gurucharan Singh from The School of Cosmic Consciousness.

How is it that our souls chose to be in this ‘family unit’?

"Sisters" by John White Alexander

Over time, we grew away from sneaking into each other room’s at night

Or talking between walls while hiding in our closets.

Our escape from “her”.

And now this wounded child turns her head away

With a pressure in her chest

Wondering, “what happened?”

One could say we are ideal characters for family movie,

The sister of the Dark and the sister of Light.

We found our tribe

We found our people we call family

By blood we will always be linked

But this blood is cold with stagnant memories

That still haunt the walls of that house.

Here you are, afraid to not show when you are angry,

Like a goddess of fire and furry.

And give your finger to the haters

While I still choose to only peek around the dark corner

Afraid of it’s power, the wicked thoughts I choose to not accept about myself.

Perhaps you look away from the white light

Knowing it could pierce through just as many veils.

I see you, my polarity.

The genius who always does what she wants

The rebel

Yet I feel deep within that I don’t really understand you at all

Nor do you understand who I really am

Nor do we want to take the time to understand each other.

And for you to swallow your filthy comments about my life

that sneak up unexpectedly like venom? 

No.

Whether you like it or not,

We are still learning who we are for ourselves

As the polarity of your Light is your enemy

Just as the glistening eyes of my dark panther within is mine.

So few have the strength to welcome both without reservation.

That would be the ultimate death.

The darkness within me is perhaps the intensity of me

That others experience.

The darkness within is the sorrow and pain that comes with being human.

How could you, God, just throw me into this madness?

Yet the darkness is the grounding energy that brings me deep into the jungle of my mind.

It safely allows my inner child to burst into a tantrum without caring of consequences.

It gives me the peace of reflection and knowing where to go next.

And so, how can I judge you, my beautiful sister of darkness.

For you are the reflection of everything I want to know for myself.

I could see how this seductive black hole of nothing could be a great lover.

Yet, do I have the courage to go into the nothingness and not fear of getting lost?

Like the yin and the yang

You and I are inseparable, interchangeable, inter-transformational.

One cannot live without the other.

We do not choose to be in a worldly connection

And for some reason I find peace in that

Yet I honor you and the place you have made in this world

I honor your tribe who I will probably never know

I honor your way of encouraging people to look past the

symbols of your initiation into this world

That decorate your body like an ancient royal robe from a casted out but once revered society

This is your gift, your way of letting the world know you are here.

 Without the dark my Light cannot have the opportunity to pierce in unknown directions.

Without you, I would not be constantly reminded to befriend the never ending circle of darkness, death, life and rebirth with every breath.

I honor the infinite Light I have recognized and cultivated to keep me anchored in Truth

from above, from the side. I honor the light that anchors me below.

Ever reminding me that you and I will always be One.

 

Announcing Limited Time Special Healing Session Offering

Announcing Limited Time Offer!
October is the 20th Anniversary of The Annergy Centre! In gratitude, we are offering by donation Zero Balancing and Healing Sessions.

October 12 and October 26 2:30pm - 5:00pm 20-30 min time slots 

This is a perfect opportunity if:

*If you'd like experience Zero Balancing or Kundalini Yoga Therapy for the first time to see if it is right for you.

*If you are on a budget and want to get a quick 'tune-up'

Did you know you can get effective benefits 

from a Zero Balancing session in as little as 5 minutes?

Location: 3269 Bloor Street West, #205 *open to the public*walk-ins welcomed* *by appointment preferred*

Celestial Communication Meditation Video: Adi Shakti mantra

 This is a time and an age where things are at a high level of...well...craziness. Yogi Bhajan came to the west to teach us tools to manage this level of craziness. It probably will be like this for awhile. Instead of throwing up your hands and calling it quits, keep up with your daily practice, whatever that may look like. One way to bring yourself back to yourself is to remember your innocence. Celestial communication is a fun and engaging meditation to do just that. It's a moving meditation that elevates your radiant body, helping your energy and circulation to flow more easily.

There's a ton to say about the radiant body. This is one of the 10 bodies that makes us who we are. T. Keep it clear and strong and it will help you get through any challenge. It gives you the projection of royalty and the warrior spirit. It gives you the grit to show up the next day and face your challenges even though your mind/ego is screaming to run far away or hide.

These types of meditations are perfect for those who don't really like to meditate or for children because they encourage a sense of playfulness and ease. Yogi Bhajan also encouraged us to teach children to meditate at a very young age so they can learn how to regulate and balance themselves. Taking into account recent events in the world, I feel the Adi Shakti mantra is calling us more than ever to develop the power and respect for the Divine feminine.

 Two weeks ago I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't sleep. Soon enough it was 3am so I decided to just start my sadhana. The mantra was playing in the background and the movements started coming to me in my mind's eye. I was never called to create a celestial communication meditation until now. Yogi Bhajan encouraged teachers to create these meditations. All other meditations and kriyas were given by him for us to teach with specific instructions.

There's a lot of explanation for the meditation and the mudra. It's important as it will give you the foundation and understanding of what's going on. Ultimately, I encourage you to just experience it. The meditation itself starts at minute 3:50.

The audio recording of Adi Shakti is from Snatam Kaur's 'Divine Birth' album which you can listen to on Youtube. or purchase through Spirit Voyage.

Tapa Yog Karam Kriya: Following through on your Intentions

     This kriya fell into my lap this week as I noticed I was falling into my usual mental patterns of questioning how I was going to get through Traditional Chinese Medicine School. I was worrying if it was the right choice adding another year to school to complete the TCMP degree versus getting the standard acupuncture degree this August like most of my classmates. Now I am able to catch these thought waves without letting it overwhelm me or causing a spiral into feeding demoting habits. These habits prevent me from managing my time wisely which ultimately stress me out more. It's getting better but is a learning process. We all come across a similar thought process (flight, fight (resist) or freeze) while on any journey of fulfilling an intention or commitment, especially those particularly difficult ones that are worth while yet make us question, "Why in the world am I doing this?" 

      Once I completed the kriya I noticed my mind was clear and re-directed on the path I originally sought out. I've been doing the kriya every day. The meditation has shown me what I need to do and has made me ultra aware of the habits that keep me from getting the things I need to get done. With that said, I'm ending this post now as I have a lot to do! Hope you enjoy the video!

Talking to Your Totem Animal: Aspects of the Psyche

For more information visit www.schoolofcosmic.com

Announcing New Collaboration with the School of Cosmic Consciousness

I'm ecstatic to announce my collaboration with the School of Cosmic Consciousness. For more information visit https://www.schoolofcosmic.com/.

Cultivating a Creative Life: What Do You Want?

There is a point in time where we rest in the womb of the Earth Mother. The soul happily  floats above it’s new vessel contemplating the cycle of the infinite, birth, death, and rebirth of  Sat Nam.  The soul asks, “Do I really want to go back and do this again? If so, what is it that I am to create in this finite time on this planet that ever so increasingly becomes more challenging to manage as generations come and go?” 

Creativity seemed to be the theme of my summer, particularly my trip back home to Portland. I go back here to rejuvenate, reconnect and consolidate my thoughts to see what is next in life. I have been collaborating and having sessions with the owner of the School of Cosmic Consciousness, Gurucharan Singh. He asks me a tough question, “What do you want?” We all get asked that question on a continuous basis. In a society of swimming through constant waves of desires, having the most opportunity compared to any other time in history to have anything we want at our fingertips, do we really know what we want? Most of us want a fulfilling spiritual life, a satisfying career, a loving family, friends and a roof over our head. I was raised to not ask for anything much because other kids in other countries were starving to death and the world was in constant state of war of some sort. If anything, it has gotten worse. So do we really have the audacity to ask for more with the amount of privilege already bestowed on us? The answer is yes. The bigger question, is what are you going to do once you get what you want? How will it create a legacy of healing and happiness for others?

Countless youtube videos, life coaches, teachers and authors share the ultimate way to get what we want. The question is, do we really know what we want to have a fulfilling and happy life? After a life of working, accumulation, collecting things and experiences what is left? How do we stay connected with our creative energy when we are continuously driven farther away from the creative source of nature itself with concrete jungles?  These questions I have continuously asked myself, often fumbling to figure out what is it that I am specifically here to do? With a curious mind I am seeing what creativity can be reborn through my consciousness.

 Focus on One Thing you want to create

The list can be daunting in regards to what you want to focus on creating. I first made 4 lists- What I was grateful for, a desire list, a short term goal list, a long term goal list. From there Gurucharan Singh helped me narrow down one or two things I wanted to focus on. There was a general theme of gratitude, desires, and short term/long term goals in regards to how I wanted to grow my business and grow in my marriage and family.

Imagine what Your Life Will Look Like

Close your eyes and imagine without hesitation the ideal life you would live. In the course, “Beyond Addiction: The Yogic Path to Recovery”, this is also known as imagining your best future self. Get as imaginative and detail oriented as possible. In the exercise I imagined myself being an effective healer having a large client base, traveling to other countries teaching Kundalini Yoga 3-6x/year to intermediate and advanced students but also able to sustain a balanced lifestyle. I also imagined being a mother and having an even deeper and meaningful relationship with my husband.

Use your Mind as a Servant

Imagine a whole ocean of treasure awaiting you. You can have anything to choose from; a sunken ship, a chest of treasure, a shoe, a tire, the infamous necklace from the Titanic movie. If you could have any one piece of treasure in what would it be? Search through the infinite material or immaterial possibilities that life offers.  The only thing is that you have only your mind to use as the net or special deep sea device to snatch it up. We use tools like Kundalini Yoga, prayer, the tantric tarot, mantra and meditation to focus our mind to find this treasure precisely. Create a prayer or affirmation in your mind and repeat it over and over again. For example my affirmation is, “Oh my mind, show me the infinite ways I can communicate with my husband so we can have an awesome marriage.”

For me, having a dedicated daily sadhana allows me to sift out the cloudiness by experiencing my full sensuality as a human be-ing.  Sadhana helps to sort through emotions that can confuse the clarity of what my soul really wants.  Start with a meditation or kriya that helps you cultivate this creative energy such as the Kriya for Creativity or the Meditation for guidance.

Ask for Help

We have guides like the Siri Guru Granth Sahib, angels, ascended masters and ancient teachers to show us the infinite ways we can utilize our mind towards this steady focus. I received a healing session lately from fellow healer and Kundalini Yoga teacher, Samantha Brown. Like other healers have said in the past, she stated that I have a lot of angels and guides available to support me but I don’t ask them for help. Now I am giving them practice and ask them for help in my day to day life. The results are interesting and effective to say the least. Thanks angels!  It may take longer to find exactly what you want with the more focus you have or it might take you straight to the golden ticket you desire. Think of this process when visioning conceiving a child or manifesting a conscious partner/relationship.  Sometimes it takes time calling in that one special soul into your life and sometimes it doesn’t.

On a more earthly realm you can ask people in your support network for help in supporting you in this process. Get involved in a meet-up group or ask someone out for a cup of tea after a yoga class. Choose people that will not only be your cheerleader in helping you keep focused but also those who will help keep you accountable. I have a few select people in my life I know will cheer me on but also give me a good kick in the ass to help me keep track on my long term goals.  Only thing is you have to be willing to accept both forms of support.

Enjoy the Process and Find Balance

In the past and even now I have fears about wanting something too specific. Sometimes we ask ourselves, “Why try when it might not manifest as the thing we want?” Then we end up binging on Netflix and not doing anything out of fear of failure. The thing is the Divine already knows what is written in your destiny but also beckons you to be a playful collaborator in the process as a co-creator. Perhaps this is why a person who is confident that they will get the big job promotion, pass the test, or get a client will actually get it versus the person who resorts to constantly being cautiously optimistic when an opportunity comes and usually isn’t happy. Sure, perhaps it won’t turn out exactly how you thought it would, but the journey is what matters most as long as your soul is in the driver’s seat.

My first year of Traditional Chinese Medicine school last year was more or less brutal mentally and physically, mainly because of my outlook. I was so intently focused on ‘succeeding’ and getting good grades while trying to manage a very busy life.  I forgot the big picture of my goal that expanding my knowledge of eastern medicine would legitimize my past and future higher education degrees and nearly 20 years of  healing skills. While getting wrapped up in old belief systems on how I ‘should’ learn I lost site of the legacy I wanted to create as a healer and the legacy I wanted to create with my husband. I focused so much on comparing myself to other students and lost track of all that I was doing  right.

Focus on the ‘WHY’

Towards the end of my last term of the first year of school I focused even more on the ‘why’ I am going back to school. The ‘what’ and ‘how’ serves as a tool helping me achieve my desire. I ended up getting about the same passing grades even though I studied less and had far less stress compared to the previous terms. I still had consistent thought patterns that said I “should” be doing more, but I chose not to give them leverage as I was already doing so much.  I was happier and so was my marriage.

What this all boils down to is transforming uncertainty and surrendering to the mystery that we must all continuously look at with a curious mind.

Are you interested in more information about creativity? Visit The School of Cosmic Consciousness to learn more.